Thursday, 29 May 2008

This is another giveaway with a difference, its not the shawl no its the "teapot" isn't it sweet. its about 400 years old and I dug it up from the forest of Narnia when I was there on a "save the whale" weekend in 1994, I wasn't "Saving the whale" at the time, but they had a great line up of half price wellies.
Anyhow, while I was foraging around in "never neverland" I happened upon this 500 year old pot! I glued it all together and found to my delight it was still in perfect working order, Oh, happy days, we had nettle tea and some other stuff that made you feel like the forest was moving in weird ways, then found out you were slightly attracted to a Whale called willy, I dated him for 3 weeks before I realised that actually I couldn't swim, so I was forced to end that relationship. Luckily the pot survived, now sadly to draw a line under the heartbreak of my "Holiday romance" and with regret I'm putting it up for grabs.
So this 600 year old teapot may adorn your table. All you have to do is leave witty comment or two.

I hope your all well and truly shabbied.


Tuesday, 27 May 2008

Here comes the Bride.

Hello Chiclets,

Went to a well good Wedding on Sunday.
My friends little Girl [all 5ft 10ins of her] Got Married.

She was the prettiest Bride I have seen in a long time, I Pray she has a Happy and Wonderful life with her new Husband.

On the "Big Day" Me and my mate Neat [yes the same as Ms SP Elchecker] did all the Dec's, well, when I say we did ALL the Dec's, really I mean we slung a few fairy lights over the odd antique, but we did it with style, well, when I say "WE" I really mean Neat flung a few Fairy lights. I was overseer........... now when I say I was the overseer,...........................No, forget it I sat on my booty, and watched, while Neat worked her socks off, and then, I took all the credit.....................Lol.
The Bride was so pleased we even got a mention in the should have seen Neats face when they said my name first............It was classic........ she looked like a suffocating fish out of [Bugger, I hope she don't know about my Blog]. anyhow I got all the credit for all her hard work.

Well she should be more extrovert, Like me. :-)

Friday, 23 May 2008

Lummy, blimming heck now what I gotta do.

I feel a migraine coming on!
Apparently I have been *Tagged* by lacy knickers on Lace threads, [I want that Crunchie Lacy].

I have to answer 6 Questions and give Honest answers. {yeah right, like thats going to happen}

1, what were you doing 10 years ago.

I was living with the Sheik "Ya Bellie" in the remote village of aggoooggoniiioooow, its a small town near Bayswater, we have 64 no 65 children and I remember sitting on the local wateringhole called *roundabouty* its leads to the 16th wonder of the world who's native name is *emtwentyfive* meaning "Many will come and sit for hours at a time" it has many brothers and sisters around this remote village. [one of its sisters is called *emione*also known for its sightseers] YA and I sat with all 66 children and decided that they needed to learn the wisdom of the Ford, so Ya gave his wealth of knowledge to the little ones, ah such fond memories, little shyte24, asked his papa, how can you tell a Capri from a Cosworth Papa, Ya replied fondly "Little shyte24, look at the sticker in the back window my child if it says *Knocked off in Hackney* its a capri, if it says *Knocked off in Harrow* its a Cosworth, my son".
YA has an amazing insite to such things " I tell you it bought tears to my eyes hearing his words of wisdom.

2, 5 things on my "To do list today"

1, Get up.
2, Drink Coffee.
3, Turn on pooter.
4, Eat.
5, Sleep.
6, Send this off into the wibble wibbly webbly just so I can annoy everyone.

3, Snacks I enjoy.

I have a particular perchance for the Glandus antus rectumious, it has a suptle yet distinctive taste, akin to the nosyparcarus gland, yet won't leave that nasty after taste in your mouth.

I also like Chocolates and icecream and M&S Prawn sarnie's oh, and jelly, cake, s'pecially fresh cream cake, flakes, roast potatoes, chips, broccoli, mars bars, cake, rice pudding, cake, I dont go in for snacking as you can see, not much tempt's me.

4, Things I would do if I was a millionaire.

Marry another millionaire, silly question really!

Oh but first I would have a face, bum, leg lift, plus a tummy tuck, breast implants and new hips and knee's.
Then give loads of my new husbands money to Charridee.

5, Places I have lived.

Here, there and everywhere, but mainly here.
I once lived in a town north of Catmandu but they threw me out for drug trafficking.
I had snuck in a pack of 16 paracetamol and got caught, it was my own fault I should have stuck them in a condomonium and swollowed them, but nothing would ever make me do that!!!!!

6, Now what was no six, oh yeah sorry to have to put you through this.
Who am I kidding I cant wait to read your bloggies.

Wednesday, 21 May 2008

Oooooh Aaaaaaaah,

This is nice, its about 62ins long and about 40ins wide, I have had it about 3 years.

While on a shindig to South Africa, I happened upon this piece of gorgeousness.

I bartered with a lady who was about 140 years old, she had very arthritic hands, Bless.

It was a traumatic time for me, yes I felt sorry for her knobbly hands and yes I knew I had to offer her a reasonable amount for her efforts as she had spent a year hand weaving this piece and thought that £35 was reasonable for all her hard work, pain and suffering :-( now I on the other hand wanted a bargain. Oh what to do!!! pay her for all that toil, or grab it out of her gnarled hands and leg it.

I took the second option and high-tailed it up the road as fast as my legs would carry me.

Yes I was caught, nothing wrong with her pins not a gnarl or a nobble anywhere!

She had me in a headlock that "Big Daddy" would have been proud of! slung me to the floor handcuffed me and dragged me to the local police station, where I spent two years in a cell no bigger than a very small swan Vesta box, starved and near to death. gasp.

After those long years, whiling away the hours, playing the mouth organ in scorching African heat and chatting with a kindly Rat called Colin, he had the goodness of heart to share his meagre food with me, bless him.

The old crone had a change of heart and asked the judge for leniency I was freed [after paying the initial £35 plus tax] to come back home to blighty. I was re-united with my cloth, thank God.

I feel have a lot to be thankful for, Colin without whom I would have gone mad maybe even started talking to myself, Thank you dear Colin wherever you are.

So Its with pain and sadness that I get rid of this lovely throw, table cloth, scarf wosit, but some holiday memories are just that, fond memories.

Leave a comment on here or on Shabby Chic forum and I will pull someones name out of the hat soon.

This is a fabricated story, not to be confused with any other story I may or may not tell later on, I am heartless and need medical help but I am desperate to get you all looking at my blog, so please keep looking in and tell your mates, I need to get rid of all these things as the house is overflowing with tat, all comments gratefully received, and laughed at...............................God Bless X

If only we knew then what we still dont know now.

Thank God for, Miss p ellch-ecker,

I am not one for worriting about what my mother tried to ram down my throat as a small child "You need to stop skivving and go to school" but have found that during my adult years I have need of an eloquence that is unbecoming of me, as you will find below.

I should have heeded her sagely advice.

I cringed at a letter I found, while scavaging in my loft recently

I had sent a letter to a friend, thanking her for the wonderful gift, she had sent to our then, small son.

It read like this.

Dear neata, ta a lot for the prescent you give us for anthony he will have yeares and yeares of fun triing to fill it full of his liitle peenieys like what his grandad gave him yesturday and he mite get moor from others in the corse of the yeare he is a goode son and has his dads eays but my mowth.....................................................

Now I kid you not this was an actual letter that I had written after my sons birthday party, the funniest bit was [ hang on, I have to giggle sorry, Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha] when reading through this letter at the end of it I seemed to have a waynetta Slob moment...............................
buy the way neata we ave spelleded his name anthony and its got a h in it after his grandad love XXXXXX angel and antony. LOL that just kills me.

All I can say is Praise God for spellcheckers.

Mum if your looking down on me now, Your right I should have gone to school and not bunked off.

Sunday, 18 May 2008

The stunts I will pull.

I dunno the stunts I will pull to get you looking at and reading my blog. Tsk Tsk.

Today's "Giveaway" is this charming set of "Oriental" dishy thingies, they are a right nice set of....erm dishy thingies. [my grasp of the English language is astounding] lol.

These could be yours if you can give me a good reason why, you should be the proud owner of these.....erm......dishy thingies.

So post haste to the comments box, surprise me with some Very good reasons why you would want them and they are yours [but only if you *win* that is, and only I will decide whether you win or not, remember my word is final, I might ask a friend, but thats gunna be my choice and I CANNOT be bribed, unless its Chocolate or Cake or Money, Jewels etc......................

Cant wait to show you whats up for grabs next, your going to love it, no honest you are.

God Bless all you lovely people and happy shabbing. :-)

Saturday, 17 May 2008

"angels shabby giveaway"

Now I have worked hard to bring you all something of great value and sentiment, this is a greatly admired piece of eclectic art desired by many, yet, only now has the true nature of this work of art, come to the top of the art worlds "Must Haves" List.

It is with a bit of sadness, that I have decided, to allow others to feast on the pureness of the Form, of the model's words that have been frozen in time on her lips, it needs appreciation by many, it would be very unfair of "shabby angelTM" to disappoint others, if you put class and taste out of your mind I am sure you would admit this self portrait of "shabby angelTM" would go a long way to hotting up any dinner party, or a Friday "after kebab" nights in.
I certify this to be a true likeness of "shabby angelTM"

Be quick if you want her, this is a never to be repeated once in a lifetime offer.

Terms and conditions apply, no animals were hurt in the making of this film, the director broke a nail but after hospitalisation she is back at her desk, the blogger excepts total responsibility for shoddy workwomanship, the office of fairtrading has been informed of "all over the top allegations made by shabby angel" she is also on the FBI most wanted list, if you see her do not attempt to apprehend dial 999 or if USA resident dial 911, all rights reserved. thank you for entering into the spirit of this give away. be safe be shabby.

Friday, 16 May 2008

This is a true likeness of me I had it done specially ahem, by one of those Photographers on Southend-on-sea beach front, as you can see the monkey escaped, apparently there is a reward out for him, he was last seen legging it up the promenade, with a packet of chips and a shandy under his arm, he answers to the name "Joyce" and should be approached with a cheeseburger and a fizzy drink.
Next time I go to have a picture done I am going to ask if they wouldn't mind shaving a few inches of them hips.
Have a shabby day.

Shabby angel is a blogger

I'll be Jiggered, Its only gone and worked!

I'm now on the www, never thought in a million years this would occur!

Not one for Evolution [as I believe in Creator God] I have evolved into a blogger.

Now I'm going to have to think of something to say......................erm...........................No, I cant say that!!!.....................................humph...........................nothing, Nada, nish.......................I will be back....later with something wonderfully witty to say [or something nicked off someone else].

So from shabby angel.

Goodnight for now.